English Jokes

 

A Lufthansa-plane had to make an emergency landing in the North Sea. After the landing, which was successful, the captain gave the following message over the intercom:

"For doze ho can swim; Norway to ze right, for doze ho cannot swim;

zank you for flying Lufthanza!"

What do you get if you drop a piano down a mining shaft?

A flat minor!

An American guy was waiting on a London street corner. An attractive English girl was passing by when a gust of wind blew her dress above her waist.

"A bit airy..." remarked the American.

Hearing this, the Cockney girl replied indignantly,

" 'ell yes! What did you expect - feathers?!"

-How did Darth Vader know what Luke Skywalker was getting for Christmas?

-He felt his presents.

-How many macho men does it take to change a lightbulb?

-No-one! Macho men aren't afraid of the dark!!!!

-How many paranoid persons does it take to change a lightbulb?

-Who's asking?????